Are They A Bad Person Or Just A Little Quirky?
Whether you're making a new acquaintance or re-evaluating an existing one, stopping to ask yourself if they're really a good person is key to surrounding yourself with positive energy. This may seem obvious to you, but when people are insincere, manipulative, or deceitful, it can be hard to tell if they're really a good person beneath the layers. Some telltale signs include unkind gossip and laughing at others' misfortunes, but some aren't so obvious. Here are 20 little signs someone isn't a good person.
1. They Lack Empathy
When you come to this person with a problem and open your heart up to them, does it seem like they care about your feelings? Lacking empathy is one of the first tell-tale signs that they aren't a great person.
2. They Laugh At People
They don't have to be doing the bullying to be a bully. If they laugh at people instead of with them, or laugh at other people getting embarrassed, that's just plain mean.
3. They Gaslight
Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse where someone makes another person doubt their own sanity. It often involves distorting that person's version of reality, denying or undermining facts, and refusing to accept their feelings.
4. They Don't Stick Around
A good friend or partner is someone who comes to your aid in your time of need. If this person ditches you when you need them the most, they may not be worth your energy.
5. They're Dishonest
Lying is a sure sign of someone who's not a very good person. If they're dishonest and constantly justifying their own lies to themselves, they lack the moral compass that makes them a good person.
6. They Never Support Others’ Success
A good person wants good things for other people. Someone who isn't good may feign support at someone else's success but privately feels envy or even scorn.
7. They Don’t Respect Boundaries
Someone who is pushy or doesn't understand or respect another person's boundaries is probably too self-centered to even notice that they're making you uncomfortable. Having a big personality and coming off a little harsh is one thing, but being aggressive is another thing entirely.
8. They Gossip Unkindly
Everyone loves a little tea being spilled, but if this person is constantly gossiping, particularly unkindly about others, it's a sign they're not a very nice person. You should know that when you turn your back, they'll be saying unkind things about you, too.
9. They Lack Manners
If the person is constantly rude to service workers or generally lacks the decency to say "thank you," you might want to reconsider having them in your life. Although these niceties aren't everything, if someone doesn't bother with them at all, it's a sign they think they're above others.
10. They Only Have Unhealthy Relationships
While many people have complicated family dynamics that are out of their control, if this person has unhealthy relationships with everyone, including friends and romantic partners, it could be that they are the problem. Evaluate their other relationships to determine if you want to be a part of their inner circle.
11. They're Selfish
Someone who is always talking about themselves and putting their interests first may not be someone you want to devote your energy to. Any kind of relationship is a two-way street, so if you feel like you're always listening to their woes without being heard yourself, then it's not a healthy connection.
12. They're Only Nice When They Want Something
Another element of selfishness that can be tricky to spot at first is that they're only nice when they want something. You may believe they're a nice person, but pay closer attention and see if that "niceness" is constant or only in moments when it serves them.
13. They Constantly Break Commitments
We all have friends who flake sometimes. However, someone who constantly breaks their promises and is always unreliable, even when they know something is important to you, may not be a friend you want to keep.
14. They're Always Caught Up In Drama
If they're always telling you about the latest drama their caught up in, maybe they're the problem. Some people thrive on drama and don't mind how many people they hurt just to satisfy their needs.
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15. They Play The Victim
Is this person always the victim? We all make mistakes and regret our actions sometimes. If this person denies any wrongdoing and always blames others, that's not a quality of a good person.
16. They're Bad Listeners
A person who always wants to talk and be listened to but never hears you out is surely somewhat of a narcissist. Someone like this is just not a very good person to have in your life.
17. They Expect Special Treatment
Some people just don't understand that they're not that special. If they do things like cutting people off in traffic or not waiting in lines, it means their ego is so big, they think they're more important than everyone else.
18. They Hold Grudges
Does this person never let things go? If they can't forgive and forget even after the offending person has apologized and attempted to make amends, they're clearly too quick to burn bridges and may not value relationships as they should.
19. They Take Credit For Others' Work
Someone who never owns their own mistakes but has no problem taking credit for another's work is someone you don't want to associate with. They're so cutthroat that they don't mind being dishonest just to get ahead.
20. They're Ingenuine
Do you notice them acting completely different in private versus when they're in a certain company? Although some variation is normal as different environments bring out different energies, an extremely two-faced person is not to be trusted.
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